I try to post at least once or twice per month for both myself and others but I am finding myself drawn to my keyboard so often at present, I could tell you that there is a lot going on inside my head of late and that would be completely truthful. For the first time in my nearly sixty years, I feel free, free of the weight I had pulled along behind me since I was a child. For all of us, there comes a time where we find peace and we feel that at last, we matter. If I’m going to be truthful I am really getting in touch with my emotions, emotions that were so very deep within so much was unearthed! Who would have thought that it would take me this long? Anyway, that’s enough about me.
We go through a range of emotions as time passes and we are never too old to learn those lessons in a place that we have long been trying to avoid. Only a short time ago I was pushed back into a place where I could no longer hold on to that which I thought I had closed the door on. Circumstance pushed me there and I had no choice but to bend to the will of my emotions. I never thought that I needed to revisit that place but in truth, I had to complete my transition, although I had long ago thought that it was a place that I was already in! Wow, life can really surprise us at times and they are not always welcome ones. Sorry me again!
So how and when do we stop learning to feel and be affected by our emotions? We don’t just how staid would our life be if we came to a place of sedation and where there is no more to learn or feel? It may sound peaceful even wished for but the truth is without life’s challenges we would never reach into those emotions that we really need to feel. Unfortunately, we can’t hand pick which emotion arrives or if it may be life-shattering because life chooses for us so we can never just sit back on our laurels. Wherever we are taken on that journey there is always a way back, eventually, and a way to pick up the pieces that will be presented in front of us resembling our life’s jigsaw.
Understanding that you can still do well and recover after experiencing a bad journey is a realisation that comes to us all if we look hard enough-nothing either starts ends begins or happens unless we try and trying is something we are world class at. Even if done so humbly or begrudgingly with acceptance, we have to complete that particular journey now because its time and time won’t wait. Lessons can be painful not only for the receiver but also for the giver sometimes without knowledge, our lives are not only shaped by our experiences but by our relationships with those that we love or loved.
We should never ask that of somebody that we wouldn’t ask of ourselves and this lesson may not be intended for you alone. In essence, we are contributing to that lesson far more than we realise we have reached a catalyst that we can no longer ignore, and we can’t or won’t move past it until our learning takes place and that journey has been completed to whatever end. Ignoring these lessons will only mean that they will need to be repeated, but there comes a time where they are seen for what they really are, life and the complicated issues or experiences that are the makeup of who we are and all of mankind.
Our difficulty is that along with what life throws at us we have to reconcile the conflict within which makes it far more difficult, and the lesson has to be experienced and digested by two. That other part of you at times completely takes over and so our actions or reactions are distorted and at times explainable why? Our interactions will always be the child protecting its self and the adult not understanding the choices made by that child. To rectify the lesson has to be learnt by the merging and the understanding of the actions taken whilst apart trying to protect ourselves in conflict, if we have any chance of becoming complete and as one softness is much needed here not judgement and at times we make all the wrong choices whilst trying to integrate.
Ego paenitet, ego eram tenens puer meus- it sounds so much better in latin but heartfelt within any dialogue………….
Ես անկեղծորեն ներողություն եմ խնդրում այստեղ ձեր ծնված լեզվով