August 2015

Our Core Element

core elementThe core element that resides within every one of us is the place where we decide the direction we wish to move in. It’s the place in which we interrupt the many things that are put up in front of us every day. It’s the place in which we sit when we need to determine both our negative and positive outcomes. This procedure in turn can manifest the complete way in which we look or relate to life. Our core element holds us where we are within the structure that keeps us upright and moving forward. We could even liken it to a seed from which we grow because every tree was once an acorn. It’s the stuffing that’s within us just like the trunk of that tree which supplies the roots of life. It’s from there our branches reach out not unlike that tree grasping at life and how we see it set out before us. Ever time this happens we see a glimpse of light which in turn will have a profound effect on our outlook of life itself. This is inevitable as we forage within that forest making room for growth; our branches always searching to find the light because put quite simply without light nothing grows.

Ok let’s just pause for a moment here – what if by some odd freak of nature we never even turned our heads towards the light, believing that our branches would only ever find their foliage within the darkness – that sounds pretty messed up: am I right? If we were to think about our lives and our role within it this falls into place often. Just by the way that we envisage and remember all that had gone on around us in order to form this state of mind. Abuse is the most destructive element ever to walk among us.

So where do I start? I guess a good place would be to recognise that every day we decide to be positive or negative within the choices that we make. Furthermore our reaction to every scenario we are faced with. Being positive or negative dictates the frame of mind that we are in. When we are feeling positive we deal with the situation calmly, thinking about our reaction before we blow the situation out of all proportion. When we are feeling negative the powder keg seems to alight itself, as we watch the line of powder creeping ever closer along the ground before us towards ignition.

We have all heard such things as the glass is half-full and not half-empty- that we should look on the bright side of life. It seems that positive people live longer. We are told that positive people make better decisions and that we should be thankful for ever day. I can agree that the above would be a great way to live your life, if only those negatives had not been instilled into your mind so completely. If only you had seen a snippet of the above whist you were that small acorn knowing which way to direct your growth. So here we are sitting within the life that was imposed upon us, overly more feeling that there is really nothing to be positive about. Wow that was one hell of a negative thought; I felt it even by the action of just placing my fingers on the keyboard. I’m not going to sit here and tell you that you have nothing to feel negative about; hell: you are carrying the weight of your past abuse upon your shoulders reaffirming your right to feel this way. In truth you have a get out of jail card which you can produce on demand I know this to be a fact because I used mine often.

So where do we go? We have to start to perceive things differently.

Some of the things that come to my mind easily used to send me on a road of complete negativity. A return call that was promised but not received. Did I think that person does not care enough to return that call as promised? Or do I think that person must be having a really busy day? An evening out has been arranged and extra transport is needed with the outcome that I end up in a taxi alone; do I think that’s just the way it is there was not enough room? Or do I think that I was singled out to travel alone? We could continue here but I’m sure I have put my point across.

Living through the terror of abuse can often make you feel complete negativity with regards to everything surrounding your life but it does have to stay that way? Can we not rearrange our thoughts to reflect the real meaning of all that goes on around us? Right here and now I can tell you that it is possible, but you are the only one that can make that change. You have to see beyond that something that for so long may have been stunting your growth. Believe that if we look beyond that point towards the light the above positives fit into our lives quite nicely. We can retrace our lives in order to start to repair the damage done during our years within abuse; there is always a back door you just need to locate it. Learn to trust that you have it within your power to alter everything from here on in. That a positive thought is something that you are allowed to have in the right here and now taking each day as it arrives. From today you could start to build a new life one that doesn’t feel the rain even before its starts raining. Sadly however much I would like to accompany you on this journey, it’s a journey we must travel alone. But I will leave you with this one positive – it’s the one journey in which you already have the ticket in your hand all you have to do is use it…….